It has been 16 months since I was diagnosed with PCOS and Insulin Resistance.
16 months. 36 pounds lost. 9 pills a day. 1 injection a week. 1 chemical pregnancy.
While I know I have had a battle and I have been a successful warrior, I am feeling…exhausted. Exhausted from feeling like this condition is consuming my identity. Exhausted from frustrations of not being able to start a family. Exhausted from all of it to the point that I don’t even want to be around my own thoughts any more.
Tonight I looked back at photos of my self 36 pounds heavier and am feeling shocked at how I looked. During the heaviest weight of my life I will forever be immortalized in 3 different sets of wedding photos where I was honored to serve as bridesmaid. I look back and can see how far I have come, but wonder how far I have to go.
This blog and this community have given me strength when I have needed it most. Now as I wait (with some super fun GI problems from my medication) on the eve of an endocrinologist appointment, I am praying my levels will be ok. Praying for progress. And praying for the ability to give my husband a family.
I am so thankful I am alive. Thankful for my progress. Hopeful things will continue to get better. This journey really has no end. So I look to you – my strong inspirations- who continue to fight and succeed with PCOS and IR. Thank you for sharing your stories and voicing support. Thank you for reminding me I am not alone.
We can all do this – we won’t stop, we will keep fighting.